Feelings or emotions are like a river, they flow
and change. As the term emotion suggests, it is
an ‘energy in motion’.
When we are not feeling our feelings
100% completely, we will store any unfelt
feelings. Just like a dam stores water.
Like water behind a dam wall, storing our feelings
creates pressure. Storing feelings can also create
beliefs that justify our feelings, which can then
create more feelings and more pressure.
Under this pressure, we can start to behave
dysfunctionally, hurting ourselves and those
around us. Eventually this creates too much
unhappiness and unwittingly some people
choose unhealthy ways to resolve it.
One unhealthy approach is to hide from our unhappiness
or feelings with substances like alcohol, drugs or tobacco.
Other unhealthy ways people try and feel happier is to do
things to avoid their feelings, such as keeping themselves
busy by working too much, or activities that may give
them intense pleasure such as gambling or over eating,
while others may create a dependence on another, such
as a boyfriend or girlfriend, to distract them from their
feelings.
Some people close down and try not to feel
anything at all, but this tends to create trauma
in their lives through accidents or illnesses.
All these attempts to secure our happiness only creates
more pressure, because we are still not feeling our feelings
completely. This pressure grows and our unhappiness
grows, so we may drink more, work more or fight more with
our partner because we feel increasingly unhappy.
Sometimes the pressure becomes so great
a person metaphorically explodes.
A happier life is to feel our feelings all the time.
For when we are feeling our feelings 100% completely,
our unhappiness together with any stored negative
feelings, will wash away, removing the pressure that
drove any of our dysfunctional behavior(s).
When we are feeling our feelings completely,
we create the space for our happiness.
Become interested in what you feel by regularly asking
yourself ‘how do I feel?’. Talk about how you feel with
others and listen when they tell you how they feel.
Truly a happier life comes when we follow our feeling,
but be careful not to confuse your thinking with your
feeling. Listen to your heart and allow yourself to
be guided by your feeling, your inner guidance.